goodbye, 2008! hello, new year!

as 2008 comes to an end, i thought i might reflect on some of the things that have happened. i look at the past year and so much has changed. from the people i talk to on a day to day basis to the person i am today. i am so different from the person i was just a year ago. it's weird how things can change so fast.. and how people can change so fast.

last january, i was with someone. i saw myself being with him for a long time just because of the history we had and the connection (i felt) we had. i was in love and i won't deny it. it's hard to say how long we were together for because it was a little complicated and it wasn't really official, but we both kinda knew we were together. he was pretty much the highlight of my year and he was my summer of 2007. i thought it would've been the same for the summer of 2008, but we had a BIG and BAD falling out. things just weren't the same and it broke me. he probably really had no idea because i always walk around with this facade that i'm okay, but that's just not the case. what happened is something that i'll learn from. i moved on and let it go. i'm cool with everything now. though i wish i could even call him a friend now because he was a really close friend to me for several years, but i can't. a friend is someone i can trust and that was broken. sometimes i still look back and think of what could have been and i sometimes even hope maybe he'd just call and REALLY apologize and mean it, but i try to just stop myself cuz it's not worth anything. just a year ago, he was a big part of my life and now, he has nothing to do with my life.

things happen for a reason. i'll see where this leads me and what the new year has to bring me. besides that, i have had the time of my life. i always love to meet new people and i've met so many. i lost some people in my life and i gained even better. i haven't been too proud of some of the things i have done in the past couple of months and i'm trying to change that. i failed a class i took over the summer (bummer!) and i've had several relations that i shouldn't be having. i'm gonna start this new year with a fresh clean slate. i'm gonna start out on the right foot. i wanna become a new person that i'm proud of. breaking my bad habits. and who knows? maybe i'll find a new love..